*English/ German version below*
#breastfeedingislove #breastfeedingisthebest a lot of hashtags are called like this when it is all about breastfeeding in different social media accounts. No doubt, breastfeeding it the most natural and most probably really the best you can give to your baby when it is about food. And on several occasions it is more than practical. But that does not mean that not-breastfeeding isn´t love, doesn´t makes you feel close to your baby and doesn´t feel right. I have 2 children and did handle dthis topice differently with both of them. And I can definitely say that if felt completely right the same time and is was perfect for me. My story is the right one for me and does not mean that for somebody else a different way is the right one.
When my daughter was born I didn´t really question myself weather I should breastfeed her or not. I was lucky and it worked out from day one on. I had to use those nipple shields but that wasn´t a problem for me at all. The big advantage of breastfeeding was definitely during night times. During the first 6 months our daughter was sleeping with us in our bed both, my daughter and I, fell easily asleep. When I heard her waking up I put her on the other side, she started drinking and fell asleep again. She was never really awake so it felt like sleeping through the whole night. Even though there was no real need for it I started giving her formula ones a day when she was about 4 weeks old. I wanted her to get used drink out of a bottle in order get a little bit more of flexibility and freedom back. I do love being a mother but the same time I wanted to be again ME if only for a little while. Before my daughter turned 6 months which is more or less what they officially advise you to do.
When almost 2 years later our son was on the way I wasn´t sure at all if I should breastfeed him at all. My husband told me that it my decision and I should to what I think feels right for me (which I am still thankful about). My daughter needed to be fed every 2 hours the first months and that was one of the main reasons why I hesitated. That meant that I had not much time to go somewhere as I felt most comfortable breastfeeding at home. Or at least not in public. I never had and bad reactions while being in public but it was just not me. What in the end made me breastfeeding were the good nights we had with our firstborn. Said and done I breastfed again like I did 3 years before. Again with those nipple shields but that was fine. Unfortunately I quickly figured out that this time it was not that easy. My son constantly lost the nipple when he wanted to drink. That meant that he got annoyed and started crying at some point. But also during day time I got the impression that he might not get enough milk but he didn´t want drink out of both sides.
When he had a similar age like my daughter I also started giving him formula and realized bit by bit that for our family life it was best to give him the bottle. Family trips, play dates and all those things were much more easy for us without breastfeeding. Especially on cold days where you cannot sit that easily on a bench and open your blouse. So while I was still breastfeeding I tried during night if the bottle to see if it works better or worse and what should I say: It was so much easier, for him and for me. That way my decision was made after 2,5 months and decided to stop breastfeeding and it only took a few days until the milk was gone. To be honest, I felt a bit melancholic when I put all the stuff like nursing tops, nursing bras, breast pump and inlays away. To know that this was the last time felt strange and good the same time.
Do I regret in hindsight that I stopped breastfeeding that early? Definitely no. Do I regret the way I handled breastfeeding with my daughter? Also a clear no. I can truly say that I do love both kids the same way, have a good bonding to both of them and even feeding with a bottle is great. I did not write this story to tell other moms what is the right way. I did write it down to show that there are many ways to do it right. No breastfeeding at all or until the kids are 3 years old – it really doesn´t matter! You and your child have to feel comfortable and most important: It has to feel right.
-photo credits Petra Rühle–
#stillenistliebe #stillenschafftnähe #stillenistschön So oder so ähnlich lauten momentan viele Hashtags auf Instagram zum Thema stillen. Keine Frage, stillen ist definitiv natürlich, womöglich tatsächlich das allerbeste für das Baby und in manchen Bereichen wirklich praktisch. Was aber nicht heißt, dass Nicht-stillen keine Liebe wäre, keine Nähe schaffen würde und nicht auch schön sein kann. Ich habe 2 Kids und es bei beiden unterschiedlich gehandhabt und kann guten Gewissens sagen, dass es beide male für mich genau so perfekt war, wie ich es gemacht habe. Meine Geschichte ist genau für mich richtig und heißt nicht, dass es für andere nicht anders richtig ist.
Bei meiner Tochte gab es für mich keine wirkliche Frage, ob stillen oder ob nicht. Ich hatte mir gesagt, wenn es klappt, dann klappt es und wenn nicht, dann nicht. Ich hatte Glück und es funktionierte von Anfang an relativ gut. Zur Hilfe benötigte ich Stillhütchen, diese störten mich aber ganz und gar nicht. Die Vorteile des Stillens lagen bei uns damals definitv nachts. In unserem Familienbett, das wir ein halbes Jahr lang pflegten, schlief meine Tochter an der Brust ein, so wie auch ich. Hörte ich sie aufwachen, legte ich sie auf die andere Seite, legte sie wieder an und wir beide schliefen ein. Somit hatte weder sie noch ich wirkliche Wachphasen und es fühlte sich sehr schnell wie durchschlafen an. Obwohl ich voll stillen konnte, fing ich nach etwa 4 Wochen an, ihr einmal am Tag eine Flasche mit Milchpulver zu geben, um mir ein klein wenig Freiheit und Flexibilität zu gönnen. Ich war und bin sehr gerne Mutter, aber genauso mochte ich es schnell wieder ein wenig ich selbst zu sein. Mit nicht ganz 6 Monaten stillte ich ab, in dem ich nach und nach einzelne, noch vorhande, Milch-Mahlzeiten durch die Flasche zu ersetzen und es klappte problemlos. Also war ich mehr oder minder der offiziellen Empfehlung gefolgt, ein 6 Monate zu stillen…
…den Rest findet ihr auf dem Blog vom Silbermaedchen
-photo credits Petra Rühle–
Leave a Reply